This film is a tedious example of art looking at itself in the mirror. Ask the Dust explores the events surrounding and inspiring the writing of the novel of the same name. It is a story of love, racial tension and writer's block. Arturo Bandini (Farrell) is the small-town writer come to Los Angeles to capture the bright lights with the power of his words.

Apparently he's starving and has one nickel left, so he goes to buy a cup of coffee and meets Mexican waitress Camilla Lopez (Hayek), a dethroned princess in a perfectly sculpted uniform. Not a fortunate encounter in my book, but it's not my book. What follows is a very adolescent romance loaded with insecurities – namely that Arturo is inexperienced with women and Camilla is Mexican. This manifests itself in an irritating interplay, and the throwing of coins back and forth each time Arturo returns to he café. Camilla says that Arturo is staying in a hotel for weak men and old women. Well, at least it doesn't accept Mexicans, says he.

Rather than plunge us into the world that the young writer is wishing to depict, the film is full of Farreller shuffling round a town that feels like it is built on half an acre of studio lot in LA, 2006. The most affecting moments are the letters from his publisher about the importance of living-time versus writing-time and other sage advices.

When the silly couple's insecurities eventually subside, the relationship is saccharine and unremarkable. Thankfully there is another chick on the scene – a doleful boozer called Vera Rivkin (Menzel) who prostrates herself in front of Arturo. Farrell has a brief quandary about choosing between a willing girl who likes his work and an obstreperous girl who can't read it, and he chooses the latter. It must be love, love, love. All the same, it's not tasty enough stuff for this two-hour film.

Eve Rowan

Rated 15A (see IFCO website for details)
Ask the Dust is released on 2nd June 2006
Ask the Dust – Official website